I can’t wait for commencement to be over.
I want to fix these thoughts that have been going on in my head. But there’s so much going on. I know meditation is really good for you and I should do it often, but I haven’t in a long time. Maybe if I make it a point to do in the morning. Idk I’ve been so averse to it, when I know it’s so good for me.
Noel has been flooding my thoughts lately. Ever since rehearsal when I caught her taking that photo of me on Snapchat and sending it to someone. Okay, so she’s a bitch. I’ve accepted that. Why does shit affect me so much and other people can just brush shit off.
I also keep thinking about how there’s really no one at Commencement that I really have an urge to talk to. Nobody I really even want to sit next to. But a positive is that at least I know a lot of people. And am acquaintances with them. I just don’t really trust anyone anymore, and it makes me insecure. I know some people think I stare, but I never mean to. It makes me feel like shit.
Alright, I’m going to bed. I think my birth control might be partly responsible for making me feel so irritable too.
Thanks for reading. xo